CONCLUSION/REVISIONS NEEDED. gracia's?

I see no point to the essay... I mean what is it really about? why are you comparing them to humans? what purpose does that serve? also humans ARE animals, so you are opening up your essay with a false statement, which is just not good practice lol... the facts section are alright but I'm not sure what it accomplishes... you need to make your essay ABOUT something and give it a purpose/goal... your intro/conclusion are pretty terrible... give your essay some... purpose... it's just some random facts that don't really go anywhere...